Has your mother ever told you that the people you surround yourself with are the people you become? Or how about, “Don’t tease that kid, Billy. He may become your boss one day.”
Well, my mom told me all of these things, but she communicated this ultimate idea of karmic interaction in a slightly different way and for a slightly different reason.
When I was in high school, a boy was stabbed in the hallway by another high school kid. I was in ninth grade, and reflecting back on that incident, I can’t imagine how terrified my mom might have been – to know that her daughter had barely been in high school for three months and then violence breaks out not even two brick walls away from her.
It’s true – the event was grave. I remember the sound of the helicopters swirling overhead and the rattle of the trailers outside. Everyone was scared and no one knew what was happening. We all thought someone was shot.
After the event, details were released to the public and I remember talking to my mom about it. She said, “Now Asia – you be careful how you treat other people, because you have no idea what others are capable of and you have no idea who they will become.”
It was like she was telling me to watch out for the potential Hannibal Lecters or Adam Lanzas or Tooth Fairys in my life. It was like I was supposed to train myself to develop some kind of radar for sociopaths and psychos and I was supposed to be able to sniff the crazy out before it could ever happen to me.
But I realize now that she wasn’t just talking about creepers, specifically.
She was talking about everyone and everyone’s potential to be, and to get in the way of someone’s be was to interrupt some kind of karmic circle – no matter how small, or huge, beneficial, or devastating.
Back To Real Life
So I’m talking with a great mentor of mine – she’s a female, an artist, and tall. We’re discussing why some people are hired, what this process of “hiring” really means, and my own astonishment at my recent success at my job.
I tell her how surprised, but intrigued I am that the company I work for hired me in the first place – I have an art degree, after all. And while that doesn’t mean I’m incapable of great things, I often wonder why I was ever even a consideration.
She told me that people hire other people that they like.
LIKE.
So that’s it, then? I just need people to like me and then they’ll hire me? Seems easy enough.
But that wasn’t the case – it’s never actually that simple. Yes – requirements do matter. Being able to perform does actually matter. But as far as getting your foot in the door? It’s because they like you.
Think about this conversely. Are we then to say that every job that has ever denied me rite of entry means they didn’t like me? Not necessarily – but they certainly weren’t feeling it.
“It’s not you, it’s me.”
The College Network and Your Karmic Circle
Imagine the rumor mill – only it’s even bigger and it has even more key players involved – players who can make or break you.
Also imagine your performance in that rumor mill – how much you contributed to it, and how much you gleaned from it.
When you think about it, it’s a complicated mass, and it’s mostly unforgiving. But on the occasion, and perhaps even equally so, the rumor mill will spit out something really positive about you – so positive, that it’s probably not even a rumor.
Most professionals call these “recommendations” or “testimonials” of your character. They’re usually deserving: you did something awesome and you impressed another colleague – hence the recommendation. Other times, they’re biased, and that can happen too. Sometimes they’re strangely welcome, and other times, they’re not.
On the contrary, there are some testimonials that are not so nice – retail or HR would call them “complaints”. Who can say if they’re actually deserving or not? What matters is that someone was slighted, and they felt like it had something to do with you. The complaint derived from the need to judge you.
Be it good or bad, the karmic circle makes no judgements – it only makes things equal.
Connecting the Dots
So pretend again that you are interviewing for a job and you suddenly realize that the person who is interviewing you is the person you just so happened to puke on at that one party because you drank too much.
Suddenly, what mom said so many years ago about treating people well comes flashing back into your head – parading around your mind like a pink elephant in a stark white room.
While this never actually happened to me, I’ve watched it happen to others. I’ve also heard of it happening to others.
The world hires people they like and they hire people who they believe will treat them well.
Think about that the next time you apply for a job – or any other thing that you really want – and deeply wonder who might be on the other side of your interview because they could easily be someone you know or someone who knows another person you know.
The world is small – and it’s silly to underestimate the power of people and investigation – both good, and bad investigation.